Saturday, 2 July 2011

New Computer, New Router, Old Excuses

I’m sorry about the last post. Indy got on here when she wasn’t looking, but never fear, I am here now and using the keyboard despite my hairy paws and the fact I am visually challenged.

Unlike my brother, I am not one to moan. Take yesterday – there we were walking down the lane when I got a sharp pain in my paw. Did I make a fuss? Did I hell. I limped bravely on until she noticed and examined my paws.

I’d trodden on a twig with added thorns and one of the thorns had dug into my pad. I didn’t as much as flinch when she pulled it out. I’ve seen Indy with thorns in his paw and he stops dead and waves it about until someone sorts it out. She says I should do that, but you know me, I don’t like to make a fuss.

But there comes a time in every girl’s life when she has to make a stand.

Oh, the computer? Yes – she’s not keen. The screen is too long and thin, the new version of Word too scary and she says why has Explorer put everything round the wrong way – like her favourites on the right instead of the left.

Photoshop didn’t work – new computer said no - so she’s had to get a new version and she hasn’t even opened the box yet which is why there isn’t a picture of me to accompany this post.

And the new system doesn't support the Canon Easy Photo Print thing she uses. Amazing isn’t it how many things new systems don’t support.

How is it progress, she said, to make everything more complicated and upside down? And why doesn’t it end with buying a computer? Why do you have to buy all the extra programs to replace the programs you know, love and are used to?

As for the painting, she did the downstairs loo and half the hall then said her knees, back, neck, arms etc etc hurt too much to continue. Poor old soul. Maybe she’ll start a new trend in half painted rooms. Then she thought the gloss had given her a sore throat, but it turned into a full blown cold. As you know I’m not one to complain but she’s keeping me awake half the night with her coughing.

Anyway, someone said I looked as if I was putting on weight. Me! Well I’m not doing the running around that I used to that’s for sure. It’s hard when you can’t see where you’re going and a tad scary. I do have the occasional sprint when I get carried away, but I prefer to stay close to the rest of the pack now.

So she got out the scales and weighed me and according to her I’ve put on over a kilo. The scales are wrong I told her. My fur is heavy. I suggested removing my collar, but it was too late, the diet grub was ordered.

It’s only a kilo I said and she said on a dog of my small stature a kilo is a lot and that being overweight won’t help my aches and pains. Huh, you can talk fatty, I said, but she didn’t hear me. So I’ve got this high oat stuff from Burns and it’s really nice! But don’t tell her I said that.

The router? Well since it arrived she hasn’t been screaming about things going down so much, but just occasionally she’ll groan “Not again.”

And if she would but admit it, this new computer is so quiet she thought something was wrong with her mouse because she could hear every click. And it takes up a lot less space on her desk. And when she switches it on, it takes but a few seconds to be ready – the old one used to take several minutes and one of its fans had to be started with the aid of a screwdriver. She’s coming round to it anyway.

When she was checking to make sure all the stuff from the old computer had arrived on the new one, she found loads of started novels. She found a book she’d started to write about writing, a book about me and Indy, stories for children, romances and all kinds of everything. She had a quick peek, then quickly closed the folder with a shake of her head and an “I can’t look at all that now. It’s doin’ my head in.”

Well, as I told her, if she shed a few of her excess stones (which put my kilo and a bit in the shade – literally) she might lose some brain flab and be able to finish some of that stuff she’d started.


  1. You're in danger of being upstaged, Teresa. This did put a smile on my face, though.

  2. Oh 'eck - brain flab isn't a real thing, is it?

  3. Do give her my sympathies, and tell her that new computers always feel a bit odd at first (unless the owner is under 25, and I blieve she's a tiny bit older than that).

    As for brain flab, tell her wine and chocolate help.

  4. Cor blimey it's a small world sometimes isn't it? I got carted off to the V.E.T.S (I can't bare to say *that* word) this week for my so called "annual checkup and jabs" and guess what the V.E.T. said? I needed to lose a few pounds, as get this, I'm no spring chicken anymore. Oh the cheek of it! Not only was I megga stressed about having to go to the V.E.T.S , but to be told I was fat too....

    And if that wasn't enough, I've got a slight heart murmur and cataracts to boot! Well what's a girl to do I ask you? Mind you her indoors hasn't put me on a diet yet (thank goodness) as I think she feels a bit sorry of me. All I heard her say to him indoors was that she "would increase my exercise". Better that than lose out on my doggie treats I can tell you! Anyhoo - best be off. Got to go look at her with my big brown eyes and see what I can cadge off her - after all it is tea time and him indoors is having chicken tonight... See ya - Molly - the canine part of Caroline's household - xxx

  5. Thanks, Martin - she's easy to upstage!

    Yes, Patsy - flabby brain syndrome, very real and she's got it bad.

    More than a tiny bit, Frances - nothing tiny about her, specially her age. She's trying the wine and chocolate as I type.

    Poor Molly - you have my sympathy. Cheeky vet talking about spring chickens! That stuff I've got is tasty though - I finished my tea before Indy tonight and usually he's way ahead of me. Those cataracts don't sound very nice - I don't like anything with the c.a.t. word in it! xx

  6. Glad you are still getting out and about Tilly despite thorns and eyes.

    Hope you all get used to the new computer soon, it's always a bit of a nightmare when you 'upgrade' to the latest thing, then half the stuff you want to use no longer functions. That's just to get you to buy more stuff really isn't it.

  7. Oh dear, diet grub. That's not good!

    One of my cats has the opposite problem at the moment and is currently on high calorie/high protein food from the V. E. T. to fatten her up.

  8. That's it exactly Joanne - I imagine making computers capable of supporting old favourite programs would be easy, it just wouldn't make much money for them!

    Hope your cat puts on weight, Helen - we went through all that with Sammy and it's horrible to see them all skin and bones.

  9. So good to hear from you Indy and Tilly. You have obviously inherited the writing gene from your Mum! I'm looking forward to the regular Indy and Tilly column! Always puts a smile on my face. Aren't new computers a nightmare. I've been lucky to inherit the old ones from Himself when he's upgraded so I'm off on a headstart. I can just yell . . .Hope you get sorted soon Teresa Sure it will be worth it xx

  10. Thank you kindly, Sue! She's getting very lazy and leaving the blogging to us xx

  11. You have such a lot to put up with, Tilly - hope your mum gets her computer under control very soon!

  12. Hi I confess to leaving Flossie to blog at times - well, she can turn her paw to just about anything so why not? You canines have a way with words that leave us mere humans speechless. Brain flab? Plenty of that here and plenty of half finished, barely started novels and short stories etc. too. I unearthed an old hard drive and found treasure - or (fools gold?)
    Have just bought an iMac so computer woes should be behind me but how I sympathise with your Teresa's recent troubles!
    Thank you for a very enjoyable read :-) Debbie

  13. I'm afraid Rosemary, I heard her say today that she likes her new computer, is coming round to the new Word and is almost ready to write her own blog posts again. Just as soon as she's over seeing the dentist...

    She will be jealous when she hears you have an iMac - she's been fancying one of those for years :-) Great to find treasure like that - and I agree, you should leave Flossie to it, we canines, particularly we female canines are very good at it :-)